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JOHNNY CRASHED & SOMEWHERE, ME
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  • Ragtime Johnny

MARIJUANA RAG – Johnny Crashed
 
 
 
Eddie worked a patch of the finest weed                                  
In all of Oxford town                                                                
Everybody knew that the bud he grew                              
Was the kind you bought in pounds                                           
It was the kind                                                                                  
The kind you bought in pounds                                          
 
Eddie had a friend from way back when 
Known him all his life
Turns out Eddie had a hankering 
For his longtime best friends wife
It was a hankering for
His longtime best friends wife
 
Lizzie was her name and she felt no shame 
About Eddie and his desire
But she wouldn't take the blame or play a silly game
And stoke that growers fire
She didn't stoke that
Stoke that growers fire
 
Eddie and his friend they made a plan                                
For a plot on Eddie's land                                                     
Grow enough weed to meet the needs                            
Of a twelve piece reggae band                                           
And while you work Eddie's fields each day                      
He'll entertain your wife                                                         
And tell her stories, share the glory                                            
Of a longtime growers life                                                     
Share the glory of                                                                   
A longtime growers life                                                          
 
So you can see where this is going where it's going to end up 
If this story was just cliche
Eddie gets the wife and his longtime friend 
Gets left with a heart betrayed
But the marijuana rag isn't written that way 
As Eddie found out one night
Coming home from a show was a handwritten note 
From his best friend and his wife
From his best friend 
And his best friend’s wife
 
Dear Eddie,
 
Thanks for the hospitality. Living at the farm for the last 6 months has been quite an experience. I've learned quite a few things in my time here. Things I'll carry with me the rest of my life. Like the value of hard work and perseverance, and getting your ass out of bed the same time as the chickens. I've learned to sharpen a chainsaw and how important it is to avoid socializing with your neighbors. I've learned how to make one battery work for three vehicles and I've learned that under very rotten windowsill is a hornets nest..and that ain't just a metaphor. But the most important lesson I’ve learned here at the farm..one that you know too…is that you gotta get them, before they can get you…
 
So the moral of the story and the point to be made
In this unpredictable life
Is that the marijuana rag should be taken to heart
When it comes to your best friends wife
And if you ever get to thinking that you’re too smart
And you won’t be the one
Think of poor Eddie coming home that night
And all his weed was gone
 

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