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Ask Redneck and Rasta

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Question
    Dear Redneck and Rasta,
 
    I am a Mother who has to suffer with a 50/50 custody situation.  And I’m thinking of starting a women’s circle, for woman like me who have to deal with their child’s fathers wanting to spend just as much time with them as their mother does.   During our “circle time” we would feed off of each other’s fabricated fears and dwell on past relationships problems. As well as exchange tools and ideas on how to complicate and dramatize our ex’s lives! Any suggestions on how to make this a reality?

    Btw I tried sharing this ides on facebook but the only response I really got was from divorcee dads . . .
​
    -Mamma Knows Best
Answer
    ​Dear Mamma Knows Best,
 
    Rasta here mon, You must find a way to cherish the time you have with your little one, rather than focus on what is not in your control.  Being of the Rastafarian faith I have learned to accept the fact that I am unable to be with all my children all the time, and must put my faith in Jah and good karma.  Remember that your baby’s daddy was once good enough to be a father in your eyes.   He probably still is, seeing that you have shared custody.  So don’t dwell on anxieties and fear!  Enjoy the time you have with your child and let him do the same.  Take this advice, and I believe you will find all the love and support you are looking for.
​
    - Rasta
Question
    Hello Redneck and Rasta,
 
    I have a bit of a problem . . . You see I am addicted to Foefur porn.  Now I’m guessing you may have never heard of Foefurs before, most mainstream sex addicts haven’t.  Foefur are fuzzy little creature that come from an island in Maine…Basically they look like Teletubbies on a mixture of acid and crystal meth!  (Don’t put this in the paper . . . but I’m getting a little “Foefur” in my sweatpants just thinking about them now!)  I can’t get enough of these little Fuckers!  I think my addiction may be getting serious.   Recently I had my wife sew me a big purple Foefur costume.  Every Wednesday night I put it on and Listen to “Fat Sex, pharmaceuticals and Moldy Blueberries” on audio book while I pleasure myself until the Foefurs fly!  I feel as though my little hobby may be getting out of hand.
 
    Help, I think I’m turning into a Foefur fucker!
​
    - CB
Answer
    WTF?

​    - Redneck
 
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