I STOLE MY BEST FRIEND'S BAND
It was late one evening, maybe Friday night
I went to old man Tucker's Pub to hit the open mic
I had me a dream of having my own band
And better yet I had myself a plan
You see the picking's kind of slim here in Oxford Hills
The drummers are always drunk and never hit their fills
And the bass players they're all white they kind of lack a certain touch
And all the guitars players think with their dicks too much
The harmonica player it seems like is always out chasing tail
And the keyboard player won't play unless money's part of the deal
Never mind a fiddle player they're way too hard too find
And everyone's favorite banjo player…he's blind
So I'll take me a little ride straight down 26
Head for the big city and get myself some kicks
And while I'm down that way I'll stop in on my old friend
He's got a family band that seems to never end
(Long winded story)
(chorus)
I stole my best friends band and I'm going to go to hell
I stole my best friends band and it don't feel so well
I stole my best friend's band an I'm going to gig tonight
I prayed to Jesus though so it should be alright
It's not like I'm a greedy man coveting your wife
And I'm certainly not jealous of all the success you've had in life
But there is one thing you got I've kind of taking a shining too
It's your *%$#@ band…you've got too many musicians and I've got too few
So the moral of this story if there's really such a thing
Is that here in Oxford Hills loyalty ain't king
And the only thing that matters if you wanna play that show
Is how many broke ass musicians do you know
It was late one evening, maybe Friday night
I went to old man Tucker's Pub to hit the open mic
I had me a dream of having my own band
And better yet I had myself a plan
You see the picking's kind of slim here in Oxford Hills
The drummers are always drunk and never hit their fills
And the bass players they're all white they kind of lack a certain touch
And all the guitars players think with their dicks too much
The harmonica player it seems like is always out chasing tail
And the keyboard player won't play unless money's part of the deal
Never mind a fiddle player they're way too hard too find
And everyone's favorite banjo player…he's blind
So I'll take me a little ride straight down 26
Head for the big city and get myself some kicks
And while I'm down that way I'll stop in on my old friend
He's got a family band that seems to never end
(Long winded story)
(chorus)
I stole my best friends band and I'm going to go to hell
I stole my best friends band and it don't feel so well
I stole my best friend's band an I'm going to gig tonight
I prayed to Jesus though so it should be alright
It's not like I'm a greedy man coveting your wife
And I'm certainly not jealous of all the success you've had in life
But there is one thing you got I've kind of taking a shining too
It's your *%$#@ band…you've got too many musicians and I've got too few
So the moral of this story if there's really such a thing
Is that here in Oxford Hills loyalty ain't king
And the only thing that matters if you wanna play that show
Is how many broke ass musicians do you know